Although I’ve been performing magic shows for many years the last address appearing regularly in advertising was my parent’s from the 1980s.

Remember the Yellow Pages? After my first couple of years of YP advertising I learned you could put a short line of sales copy where your address normally appeared. From then on I never used my address again. Those ads were pricey and I wanted to make the most of my Yellow Pages real estate. This change also stopped the very occasional door knocker coming to my parent’s home thinking it was a magic shop!

As the internet age bloomed all sorts of directories and listing services came and went. Some still linger with info, it seems, they must have initially gleaned from old Yellow Pages, old city directories and, no doubt, scraped from each other.

I’ve thought for a while I should try to make a compleat list of these Dubious Directories. Compleat being the archaic form of complete. These directories being, frequently, the archaic form of up-to date!

So I did a reasonably thorough search of “Owen Anderson Magician” using Google, Bing, Yahoo, Duck Duck Go and Ecosia
(5 seemed like enough). Made notes and paged down thru search results until this magician disappeared.

Firstly, kudos to Google whose search results had the least crap! The big fish in the search pond works to stay current thank goodness.

Most of them listed the correct phone.
Makes sense since I’ve had the same number for over three decades. But the other info they list? Hmm…

The best place to reach me is through the contact page on this website. All other info you see online, especially if the listing page is plastered in “AdChoices” type ads, should be considered dubious. Better yet it shouldn’t be considered at all!

So…, although I suspect this task will end up being a bit like playing dubious directory whack-a-mole, as of January 2023 here we go:

Zoominfo.com

— Wrong address. Correct website & phone. Their descriptive blurb about me appears to be a random slice of text grabbed from my website.

Our friends at Zoom also say I have less than 25 employees and less than 5 million in sales. No kidding?! Similar listings I looked at all said the same. They also list NAICS and SIC industry codes for me; both of these are incorrect or, more accurately, don’t produce a valid result when I tested them.

Funny follow up: As I was editing this post I got 2 phishing emails purporting to be from ZoomInfo asking me to ‘click-this-link’ to update my profile. They came within 24 hours of each other from sketchy email addresses. Almost identical clunky wording in both. Obviously not from Zoominfo but the timing made for quite the coincidence.

Zaubee.com

— Correct phone. Correct website. All other info comes from my Google business listing so save yourself some trouble and just go there. It will be on right hand side of any Google search for me results page.
Listing page plastered with AdChoices ads too.

YOYS.ca

— Wrong address. Wrong website. Correct phone. This one appears and disappears from searches willy-nilly, you know, like ships passing in the night, or UFO sightings, or Loch Ness Monster sightings or insert the cliché of your choice…

YellowPages.ca

— Basically a blank listing. Why even bother Yellow Pages?!
Phone & website correct but you have to do extra clicking to find them.

top-pros.ca
— Correct phone. Correct website. If you click anything else you are taken to my Google business listing.
I am listed with several other local entertainers on a collective page.
We all have a descriptive blurb that reads like it was written by a robot because it probably was.

Starofservice.ca

— This one is primitive. A page collectively listing various acts all using similar blurry promo images likely pinched from a stock photo service. All 12 listed apparently have the same postal code and, I don’t mean to brag, but I’m featured twice in their top 10…! Also, in the top 12 is a magician who passed away in 2009.
To get any further info they want you to fill out an online inquiry form. PLEASE DON’T!
Beware of aggressive online forms–here there be dragons!

Profilecanada.com

— Wrong address. Correct phone.
And, apparently, I have 2 employees!

phonepages.ca

— Wrong address. Correct phone.
Lots of AdChoices ads too.

N49.com

— Wrong address. Correct phone.
Listing is so primitive it’s comical. Why bother?
At least you’re not bombarded with AdChoices ads.

MAPQUEST.com

— Wrong address. Old website. Correct phone.
Multiple AdChoices ads on the listing page.
Also, apparently Mapquest is still a thing…!

Kompass.com

— Under the first of many AdChoices ads there is a single line stating ‘this company is no longer referenced on Kompass’ followed by a reference to the usual wrong address from 1980s. Sigh…
Hoping this listing is soon to fade away completely, or would that be kompletely? Fingers crossed or, you know, krossed!
Also, did I mention the multiple AdChoices ads on the mostly blank listing page? I will if you like…

Ibegin.com

— Wrong address. Correct phone. Listed in the music category.
Lots of AdChoices ads.
I begin… to smell a musical rat!

Infobel.com

— Wrong address. Wrong website. Correct phone.
Lots and lots and LOTS of AdChoices ads.

Help We’ve Got Kids:

— Wrong phone. Old email. Old website.
Listing page littered with those ubiquitous AdChoices gems plus aggressive pop-up boxes/ads.
Grab your Swiffer, this one’s real dusty!

Goldbook.ca

— Correct phone. Page features a map that shows me, and the many others collectively listed, as living at City Hall. Refreshingly, because of that, they don’t show an incorrect address! Makes for a nice change of pace don’t you think?
Website lacks a security certificate so likely not a well maintained.
They too list the deceased magician mentioned earlier.

DNB.com

— Wrong address. Correct website. Any other info they might have is behind a paywall and, to quote Mr. T., I pity the fool who pays Dun & Bradstreet for that!

Canadianorglist.ca

— Wrong address. Correct phone. No other useful info. Yet another listing in the music category?!
Lots of AdChoices ads all over the listing.
Had never previously encountered this one before undertaking this little selfie search project.

CANADIANCOMPANIES.COM

— Wrong address. Old website. Correct phone.
Multiple AdChoices ads on this cluttered page.

Ca.showmelocal.com

— Wrong address. Correct phone. Having fun yet? Me neither but we’re almost done!

Bing

Sigh… the ‘slug line’ on Bing’s Twitter page proclaims “Your AI-powered co-pilot for the web.”

Seems funny to add Bing itself to this list of dubious directories yet here we are. Searches for “Owen Anderson Magician” on Bing produce a right side ‘business listing’ result similar to that on Google except it’s pointless.

Said listing notes that “users are reporting this business may not exist.” It also provides an out-of-context snippet and photo from my website, you know, from the business that may not exist…

Also, as of this writing, the top of Bing’s search page results, along with their pointless business listing, feature an ineffectual map with, you guessed it, that 1980s address; same as the other dubious directories use.

Seriously Microsoft, you’re a trillion dollar company and this is the best my AI powered co-pilot for the web can do? Google me!

Below the map was my actual website so thank you for that but scrolling further down quickly leads into the mire found and noted throughout this blog post.

All of this helps to explain why, according the my website analytics, less than 0.01% of searches (under 10 in last 6 months) were conducted via Bing. Pretty sure at least a couple of those searches were by me researching this blog post. So, like I said, sigh…

The Bash

This one is quite baffling. The Bash, formerly known as GigMasters, is an event listing service that connects buyers and sellers of entertainment. They quite reasonably charge fees for doing so.

I have not been an active member of this site since 2013 yet they continue to host a profile of me. It still shows up prominently in searches of my name, often near the top. Kudos to their SEO wizardry but why?! Clicking takes you to my dormant profile page. No doubt they funnel any inquiries towards other entertainers still active on their site.

On the plus side I look 20 years younger thanks to that outdated promo photo…!

Another online event listing service called Bark.com showed up in ads constantly when I was doing my searches for this blog post. Not ads for me specifically as I have no connection to them. I guess they just advertise heavily when your search is for entertainment.

If you want to use an online service to book me visit GigSalad where I maintain an active up-to-date listing.

Allbiz.ca

— Same crap as many of the others, but, voilà, it’s in French!

This list of dubious directories is up-to-date, if that’s the right way to think about this, as of January 2023.

As I mentioned earlier please use my contact page. It’s the best way to reach out.

I can’t be held responsible for anything mailed to any address noted in these dubious directories. Whomever lives at that frequently cited 1980s address now is certainly not me. Please leave them alone. You’ll be disappointed if you knock on that door expecting to find me…, or a magic shop!

Might revisit this post way down the road and update. Here’s hoping that many of these dubious directory links noted above will be no longer be functional!